Fuck the Melbourne CBD – Let it die
The Melbourne CBD – globalist shithole capital of the southern hemisphere.
Mike Cannon-Brookes calls Klaus Schwab for further advice on how to undermine Australia’s energy security
The 2009 World Economic Forum Young Leader held a two hour teleconference with Schwab, discussing ways to send Australia back to the stone age and expedite the Great Reset.
Australian man who only took vaccine to feed his family excited about inflation
Chris Simmons, of Penrith, who suffered myocarditis from the Pfizer vaccine after being forced to take it for work, said he was excited about sky high food prices and the prospect of going from one manufactured crisis to the next.
Lismore man who lost everything in floods thanks Albo for sending thoughts and prayers from Mardi Gras
Albanese said he will be scheduling more photo ops in the coming weeks and vowed ‘if Scomo doesn’t hold a shovel then I sure as hell won’t be getting my boots muddy.’
Davo predicts WW3
Take cover, guys – with Davo’s (did Peachy just say “Davos”?!) recent predictioneering form, the likelihood of WW3 being caused by Putin has just risen substantially.
Tim Flannery quietly announces his retirement after record flooding on East Coast
The man that pronounced it would never rain again has confirmed that he will not be participating in public debate, and that his decades long grift may have finally run it’s course.
Australian property developers to assist with flood relief by building thousands of more homes in known flood plains
The move comes as more homes are wiped out in NSW and Queensland due to record flooding in areas that are historicaly reknown for flooding.
Lismore man drowns in flood water after refusing rescue from unvaccinated SES volunteer
The SES has declined to comment on the matter, but is believed to be introducing a policy to ban anyone who is not triple vaccinated from saving lives.
Albanese finally arrives in flood affected Queensland after finding a woman to hold his umbrella for him
Albanese will be touring the flood affected areas with Tim Flannery lecturing residents about climate change.
Scott Morrison catches teh covid
The bloke is pretty fat, so has a bigger than normal change of carking it. Perhaps 0.3% with no treatment. I hope he had all his boosters….
Australia to stand-up to China by confiscating remaining civilian firearms and shipping them to the Ukraine
Defence Minister Peter Dutton and Home Affairs Minister Karen Andrews made the announcement of total firearm confiscations in a joint press conference, to show they were serious about protecting Australia.
AFL umpires to wear defibrillators for 2022 season to fight climate change
EZFKAFL CEO Gillon MacLachlan has rejected claims that the move was purely to head off embarrassing on-field collapses unrelated to mandates and purely about reducing carbon emissions.