Andrews called protestors extremists, despite months of Victoria Police-led bashings, shootings and general violence and arrests of political dissent.
Stenographers from across the media have lashed out on Twitter, saying they’re disappointed that they weren’t able to go on yet another insufferable, bullshit tirade about ‘Americans and Guns’ and that they’ll be praying for another mass casualty event to stand on the graves of the Port Arthur victims again.
As the flights to EZFKA return, foreign students say they are already looking to do fuck all and get their degrees off the backs of locals, while checking out the property market for their parents.
Capp says the move will hopefully drive property prices back up to sustainable levels while international students remain outside EZFKA.
The strain was uncovered right after the new Omicron variant was released last week, sending thousands of EZFKA residents back under their bed and reaching for the Depends.
The study, conducted by the Cash For Comment institute, has found that the latest Omnicron variant has appeared just as protest numbers nationwide reach record numbers and Victoria is set to vote on the permanent pandemic legislation.
Under the new rule, teams would be allowed to forfeit if too many players collapse from heart attacks during the game, however the opposing side would be awarded the win and the three points. Forfeit would also mean automatic elimination from the FFA Cup.
The move, which has horrified everyone at ASIO, will be ‘a boon for Australia’s strategic defence and real estate sector’ according to Morrison.
The Premier has made it clear that another move of goalposts is scheduled for December 15th, much to the dismay of copium addicts still believing anything the LNP says.
Lambie was reportedly offered 7 figures in exchange for her soul, with Satan and Pfizer CEO Albert Boula agreeing to terms with the independent earlier this year.
David Erikson from the North Shore, said it was a hard decision voting for which proxy of billionaire property moguls will destroy his suburb with high rise apartments and mass immigration.
The study, conducted by the Pay Us Protection Money Institute, found that black shirted government officials enforcing COVID mandates were essentially useless and should ‘go fuck themselves.’
Mark Morrison, of Newtown, said he was delighted to see the vibrancy of excessively dangerous driving from third worlders back in the CBD and suburbs.
Gunner is currently paying $1.05 after slightly nudging out Jacqui Lambie, Daniel Andrews and Scott Morrison for the top spot. Gunner’s recent unhinged performances on television this past week have him as the favourite to bring the book of revelation to reality.
The video, released on Youtube last night by the Corporate Media Are Fucking Cringe Assciation, is a detailed instructional to de-program your family members and stop them from listening to anything David Koch or Natalie Barr says.
The struggling hospitality sector, which spent the last 18 months bending over for government mandates, is delighted that cheap imported labour is back to save the day and the EZFKA spirit of exploitation is in vogue again.
“We’ve tried labelling them Nazis over and over again, but people can see that’s just a complete wank. God help us if they ever read about what the Bolsheviks did because it is Soviet Russia all over again.”
After winning the Controlled Opposition of the Year Award, Guy said he’s more than prepared to sell out the Victorian public and has a proven track record of doing so, as the Andrews government struggles to find a deciding vote.
Lambie is apparently under the care of Baphomet until further notice.
Meddick gave several versions of events on 3AW, but says his story will change as new information comes to light.
Lowe slammed suggestions that he should actually do something and confirmed that with borders re-opening negative rates aren’t needed ‘just yet.’
RBA Governor Phil Lowe says he remains committed to ‘lowering rates and opening the gates’ regardless of who is in Kirribilli House.
Federal Labor leader Anthony Albanese has also authorised the deployment of Aldi bags full of cash from the NSW Labor branch, to ensure the integrity of the vote from the crossbench.
Somyurek filed his vaccination papers today indicating he can attend parliament to vote. Andrews has offered cash payments of $100,000 to any Police member who takes out Somyurek within 100 metres of parliament house, with a free red shirt for any head shot.
Commissioner Shane Patton has denied allegations that the organisation brought it on themselves by using the $5000 an hour Police chopper for mask enforcement.
Plibersek was honoured to accept the awards, however was disappointed that she couldn’t have done less during her tenure.
John Roberts, 47, watched his pet staffy Woofa die a slow, painful death due to a stomach infection, after several vets refuse to treat him due to his unvaccinated status.
It is understood that Catherine Andrews has reservations about moving to Beijing, due to the ‘high volume of traffic and number of cyclists.’
The gallows brought to the protest on Saturday was widely panned for being more ‘symbolic than functional’ and that it would be ‘impossible to actually hang anyone from.’ However, a separate one brought to the protest last night received critical acclaim for it’s functionality and realism.
Bandt, speaking from his private charter jet on with Sarah Hanson-Young, called for all volcanoes to be permanently imploded as well as a ban on lava.
