Satire

McGowan called the President for advice on how to deal with the public embarrassment and coping strategies, as iron ore continues to plummet below $100 a ton.

After months of firing people for not submitting to an experimental medical procedure, Morrison said the time was ripe for replacing skilled EZFKA workers with lower wage, foreign counterparts.

“All it will take is a few dissenting members to grow a set and dissent on the vote. Although that’s too much to ask from some of them clearly.”

“People need to understand that words are violence and that asking unauthorised questions are considered an act of terrorism. I would like to remind New Zealand that the government is the sole source of accredited truth.”

The tapes, which apparently are of Daniel Andrews in many compromising positions on his last trip to China, will be deleted if the legislation passes.

he move comes after claims of Wilkinson’s move to Channel Ten over a gender pay gap dispute were found to be largely bullshit and purely about money.

Opposition leader Anthony Albanese stated his party will be disproportionately impacted by the proposals, particularly in the migrant areas at the state level.

“The COP26 summit couldn’t be better timed as a lead-in to summer. Confronting China and India over pollution is quite clearly racist, so soft target yellow journalism it is.”

“Some restrictions such as masks, lockdowns and the rest will remain. However, by that stage we should be on at least our 26th booster shot, so vaccination will clearly be our best way out of this.”

The tweets, reportedly called Smith ‘an irresponsible dickhead that should lose his licence’ and wanted a ‘full investigation by Victoria Police and IBAC into the incident.’ The tweets were soon deleted and her account locked to private.

Fairfax Chairman Peter Costello said the move had been in the works for some time and brushed off suggestions it was a conflict of interest.