Progressives Cancel PVO

Once a darling of Australian progressives, Peter Van Onselen (PVO) has performed the greatest heel turn since Hulk Hogan after taking legal action against Professor Gemma Carey over a defamatory Twitter comment and photo. The photo in question included a young Christian Porter, Nick Coatesworth, Ainslie van Onlsen and PVO. For legal reasons we are … Read more

Presentations to hospital skyrocket, progressive schadenfreude to blame

Medical groups have issued a public health warning regarding a recent spike in presentations to hospital emergency departments. “Progressives have overdosed on schadenfraude, and we think it started with Gladys Berejiklian’s ICAC hearing,” commented a spokesperson from the Economic Zone Formerly Known as Australia Medical Association (EZFKAMA). We interviewed doctors on the front line, many … Read more

Woman dies after multiple jabs

After further investigations NSW Health announced that Premier Gladys Berejiklian has developed a terminal case of corruption, which has been attributed to being directly related to multiple Maguire jabs. It was revealed that Berejiklian was receiving these regularly over the last 5 years, and due to the severe nature of the corruption allegations, is now … Read more

Porter keeps job, keeps cash

In a dark day for EZFKA, former Attorney General Christian Porter has resigned from Scott Morrison’s ministry after revealing he had accepted an anonymous donation to help cover his personal legal fees. Mr Porter’s future in federal parliament had been in doubt following revelations that a “blind trust” had paid for his discontinued defamation case … Read more

Brendan Murphy awarded Father of the Year, Scott Morrison furious

Former Federal Chief Medical Officer Professor Brendan Murphy has been awarded Father of the Year for 2021. Best known for his poor response to the Covid19 pandemic which included bungling the hotel quarantine system, Professor Murphy found out about the award in the days prior to Father’s day, claiming it was a “huge and unexpected … Read more

Property Investors to be given vaccination priority and Cash bonuses

In a highly anticipated move, Prime Minister Scott Morrison called an urgent press conference to announce that property investors would be moved to a new priority category as part of the national COVID vaccination rollout plan. Additional cash incentives would also apply under a newly announced Property/Realestate Investor Keeper scheme. “The details are yet to … Read more