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Satire

“Don’t blame migrants for Australia’s housing crisis” says Indian landlord exclusively leasing properties to other Indians

May 19, 2023 by Timbo

The rebuke comes as rental ads all over Gumtree and Locanto reveal hundreds of properties in Melbourne and Sydney available for lease, but only to “other Indians.”

Categories Satire Tags Satire 68 Comments

Albanese announces more drag queen story times to be rolled out nationally until everyone stops talking about immigration

May 17, 2023 by Timbo

The PM expressed his concern that too many people are pissed
off about the country being invaded through the front door, and that
distractions galore are needed to diffuse an escalating situation.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 124 Comments

Clare O’Neil announces Australia will begin deporting citizens to make way for 700,000 migrants

April 30, 2023 by Timbo

Police and military will be deployed to evict white Australians and seize their houses in order to hand them over to hundreds of thousands of migrants.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 276 Comments

“Give back stolen indigenous land” says Pakistani who has helped millions of migrants steal indigenous land

April 6, 2023 by Timbo

Rizvi said memories of choosing to voluntarily migrate from Pakistan, parachute into a safe public service job for 20 years and then work to dismantle the Australian working class motivated him to respond.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 309 Comments

Paul Keating slams AUKUS submarines as worst deal since he sold out Australia’s entire industrial base to China in the 80’s

March 18, 2023 by Timbo

Keating was scathing at the price tag and the mere suggestion that Australia spend any of it’s GDP on defence equipment at the expense of the property market.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 39 Comments

Australia to fight ageing population by letting elderly third worlders chain migrate to Australia

February 14, 2023 by Timbo

“No-one had the ALP on their 2023 bingo cards to destroy what’s left of our public institutions with chains of endless foreign welfare parasitism,’ Giles said.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 246 Comments

Lifeline putting on extra staff in case Novak Djokovic wins Australian Open

January 29, 2023 by Timbo

The organisation expects to field a record number of calls from triple vaccinated Victorians considering self-harm, should Djokovic win the title after being banned for not taking the jab.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 4 Comments

Chris Minns makes election promise to help NSW renters by lobbying for another 200,000 migrants a year to live in Sydney

January 14, 2023 by Timbo

Minns has also hired Meriton’s Harry Trigaboff as his campaign manager with the aim of making housing affordability the #1 issue.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 42 Comments

‘Foreigners only’ Australia bans it’s own citizens from buying property

January 4, 2023 by Timbo

The ban comes into effect immediately, with Chinese buyers set to return to Australia next week.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 224 Comments

Charges dropped against Aboriginal teens suspected of fatal home invasion after Police confirm they were performing a ‘Welcome to Country’

December 29, 2022 by Timbo

The two teenage boys, already out on bail for a previous offence that day, were pardoned by Queensland Police and Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk after it was confirmed that they were performing a Welcome to Country inside the house.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 83 Comments

Australia to avoid recession in 2023 by increasing immigration to record 1 million

December 19, 2022 by Timbo

The move comes after Australia’s housing market continues to go south and saving landlords becomes ‘priority one’ yet again.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 176 Comments

Tragedy strikes at Western Sydney school as multiple children beheaded by son of repatriated ISIS bride

October 29, 2022 by Timbo

9-year old Muhammad Al-Muhammad beheaded 4 of his classmates at Auburn Primary School this morning, while screaming ‘Allahu Akbar’. NSW Police and ASIO are baffled as to his motiviations.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 38 Comments
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