Former Prime Minister Paul Keating has slammed the recent purchase of 8 nuclear submarines under the AUKUS deal as the worst deal since he was Treasurer in the 80’s.
Keating was scathing at the price tag and the mere suggestion that Australia spend any of it’s GDP on modern defence equipment at the expense of the property market.
“These things are a rip-off. I couldn’t even get back to Epstein’s Island with my daughter in one of those without being detected,” Keating said.
“This is by far worse than the time I offshored our entire manufacturing and productive heavy industry capacity to a country now using it as leverage against us. Absolutely appalling decision.”
Keating scoffed at reports that his retarded ‘import Chinese otherwise they won’t trade with us” mantra from the 90’s that has resulted in foreign political subversion as the main culprit.
“I took a dumb shit ideological bet on an ‘Asian century’ which no-one wanted anyway and that has completely backfired. We need to secure our future by continuing to mass import hostile migrants and fracture the social cohesion even more. I won’t be around to see it, so fuck it.”
Keating further denied rumours that he and Jordan “Friendlyjordies” Shanks were an item.