Julian Assange granted full asylum in Australia after murdering pregnant woman
Home Affairs Minister Clare O’Neil has welcomed the decision and is currently working toward a new category of visa for paedophiles and murderers.
Satire
Australian man enjoying another day in the most successful multicultural country watching Jews and Muslims fight each other in Melbourne
Home Affairs Minister Clare O’Neil has vowed to look into the violence, and promised to protect property prices in the area by any means necessary.
New study confirms Australian politics now exclusively a contest to see who can import the most Indians
The study found that both major parties had abandoned every other issue currently plaguing Australia and had exclusively fixated on importing as many subcontinentals as possible.
Calls for more skilled migration after Indian subcontractors at Australia Post seen destroying parcels
The clip taken at a Sydney distribution centre, showed several sub continentals throwing packages around sparking outrage and calls for even shittier imported labour from the Business Council of Australia and other lobbyists.
After Voice referendum is blown the fuck out, affluent white women across Australia disappointed they don’t get to tell everyone else what to do
“We haven’t been this upset since COVID was over and we were running around telling everyone to put their masks on and get vaccinated,” Teal MP Allegra Spender said.
Clare O’Neill thanks Israel for taking immigration and the housing crisis out of the media cycle
O’Neill said the really questionable attack by Hamas this week and subsequent saturation of the media cycle, was perfect timing for both that and the disastrous Voice vote.
Clare O’Neil to crackdown on migration fraud by increasing immigration to 1 million a year
Meanwhile, Opposition Leader Peter Dutton has expressed his outrage at the proposal and countered with an increase to only 999,000 migrants a year ‘with a plan.’
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Mass suicides reported across Melbourne after Daniel Andrews resigns from politics
The most amount of suicides were reported in Melbourne’s south-east, as a large number of Andrews supporters participated in a mass die-in in front of the Andrews’ residence in Mulgrave.
Daniel Andrews resigns from politics after Chinese property developer ‘finally made the right offer’
Spokesperson Wei Fuk Yu said he was relieved he didn’t have to release the blackmail tapes from Andrews’ last trip to China.
Australian man returns to normal mode of not giving a fuck about womens’ sports after Matildas eliminated from World Cup
An Australian man has expressed his relief at the Matildas being eliminated from the World Cup, as he can finally go back not giving a fuck about women’s sports. Dave, from Brisbane, knew that the support for the Matildas was contrived bullshit from the beginning and was looking forward to peace and quiet from NPC’s … Read more
WA Aboriginal farm grab laws scrapped as Kos Samaras blames poor people for ‘Yes’ vote collapsing
Invoice to Parliament ‘Yes’ campaign on suicide watch