“Stop being selfish and follow the rules” says Melbourne man on Facebook demanding the closure of small business to “keep him safe”

“I don’t care how many people kill themselves, go bankrupt, lose their relationships and everything they’ve worked for, that’s not the point you selfish pricks. Bloody selfish arseholes putting people at risk with a disease with a 99.98% survival rate that affects mainly elderly and obese. Do as your bloody told!”

Study finds life imprisonment for state premiers would end Australian lockdowns overnight

A new study in EZFKA has found that life imprisonment for all of Australia’s state premiers, would end lockdowns instantly and return Australia to proper normalcy. The study, commissioned by the Institute of To The Barricades Mon Frere, found that putting all six state premiers and two territory chief minister in prison for no less … Read more

Melbourne man says he’d much prefer to wait for Pfizer’s Myocarditis rather than have Astra Zeneca’s blood clots

A man in the EZFKA city of Melbourne has stated that he’d much prefer to wait for Pfizer’s vaccine and Myocarditis, rather than risk it with blood clots from the Astra Zeneca. Drawing inspiration from Newscorp journalist Georgie Parker earlier in the week, David O’Reilly, 56, from Malvern said that he was not going to … Read more

“These are shitty choices” says Melbourne man looking at current Victorian government

A Melbourne man who voted for Dan Andrews has expressed his regret while watching the latest press conference on TV, where Andrews labelled behaviour of people in Richmond and Caufield as “shitty choices.” Robbo, 27, expressed his remorse from his couch, at electing a career bureaucrat drunk on power who is essentially ushering in “Weimar … Read more

“Get vaccine advice from your doctor” says man that ordered AHPRA to silence all of Australia’s doctors on vaccines

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has told the Australian public that they should seek health advice on vaccines from their doctor, despite growing rates of vaccine resistance. However, a document made public this week showed that the Australian Health Practitioners Regulatory Authority has silenced all doctors in Australia from dissenting views and threatened to deregister anyone … Read more