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Morrison wins $1 million reward for finding Cleo Smith

November 5, 2021 by Gouda

Western Australia’s Police Commissioner says a $1 million reward offered to find missing four-year-old Cleo Smith has now been awarded to Prime Minister Scott Morrison, who claimed to have prayed for her safety. The Prime Minister, who was in Glasgow at the time Cleo was found, forwarded his application for the reward to the WA … Read more

Categories Satire Tags Australian Politics, Satire 3 Comments

McGowan calls Joe Biden after shitting his pants looking at the iron ore price

November 5, 2021 by Timbo

McGowan called the President for advice on how to deal with the public embarrassment and coping strategies, as iron ore continues to plummet below $100 a ton.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 2 Comments

92% of the women had a spontaneous miscarriage in the first 13 weeks!

November 4, 2021 by T
Breakthrough!

This is all a bit sad, but since no one else seems to be keeping track of this, I guess I can do it for a bit. The first is an update for the ladies! Hope you are going well. Hope you have already had your allocated rug rats, or both you and your partner … Read more

Categories Uncategorized 33 Comments

Morrison proposes new “Great Replacement” immigration program to restart Australian economy

November 3, 2021 by Minister Sinister

After months of firing people for not submitting to an experimental medical procedure, Morrison said the time was ripe for replacing skilled EZFKA workers with lower wage, foreign counterparts.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 5 Comments

Victorian Labor Party members file lost property reports for missing testicles after new pandemic powers pass lower house

November 3, 2021 by Minister Sinister

“All it will take is a few dissenting members to grow a set and dissent on the vote. Although that’s too much to ask from some of them clearly.”

Categories Satire Tags Satire 2 Comments

Jacinda Ardern forced into self-isolation with hurt feelings after being confronted with question she didn’t pre-approve

November 3, 2021 by Timbo

“People need to understand that words are violence and that asking unauthorised questions are considered an act of terrorism. I would like to remind New Zealand that the government is the sole source of accredited truth.”

Categories Satire Tags Satire 4 Comments

Xi promises to delete blackmail tapes of Daniel Andrews if permanent pandemic legislation passes upper house

November 3, 2021 by Minister Sinister

The tapes, which apparently are of Daniel Andrews in many compromising positions on his last trip to China, will be deleted if the legislation passes.

Categories Satire Tags Satire

Australian book stores move Lisa Wilkinson’s autobiography into fiction section

November 2, 2021 by Minister Sinister

he move comes after claims of Wilkinson’s move to Channel Ten over a gender pay gap dispute were found to be largely bullshit and purely about money.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 9 Comments

“We’ll never win another election ever again” ALP furious at new voter ID legislation

November 2, 2021 by Minister Sinister

Opposition leader Anthony Albanese stated his party will be disproportionately impacted by the proposals, particularly in the migrant areas at the state level.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 2 Comments

Australian journalists set for another gruelling summer of blaming annual bushfire season on climate change

November 2, 2021 by Minister Sinister

“The COP26 summit couldn’t be better timed as a lead-in to summer. Confronting China and India over pollution is quite clearly racist, so soft target yellow journalism it is.”

Categories Satire Tags Satire 9 Comments

McGowan says ‘some restrictions will remain’ after WA border re-opens in 2047

November 1, 2021 by Minister Sinister

“Some restrictions such as masks, lockdowns and the rest will remain. However, by that stage we should be on at least our 26th booster shot, so vaccination will clearly be our best way out of this.”

Categories Satire Tags Satire

Catherine Andrews deletes tweets after Tim Smith crashes car

November 1, 2021 by Minister Sinister

The tweets, reportedly called Smith ‘an irresponsible dickhead that should lose his licence’ and wanted a ‘full investigation by Victoria Police and IBAC into the incident.’ The tweets were soon deleted and her account locked to private.

Categories Satire Tags Satire 5 Comments
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