Satire

McGowan says best way to prevent future lockdowns is using more Indian security guards working multiple jobs

by

WA Premier Mark McGowan says best way to prevent future lockdowns is to use more private security, with a continued preference for Indian international students. After a near-miss from a returning traveller from an Indian wedding, the second lockdown in WA was caused by an international student working a second job as an Uber driver … Read more

Macrobusiness comments section shut down after pro-Scott Morrison comment gets past censor and causes turmoil

by

The comments section of Macrobusiness was temporarily shutdown tonight, after a comment supporting Scott Morrison’s temporary travel ban from India managed to get past the censors. The comment from irregular user ‘Johnno1223’ stated that ‘the ban was only temporary and should be used to protect the citizens of EZFKA. Plus it has the added benefit … Read more

Dual-citizen Indian that hasn’t been to Australia in ten years says he’s been abandoned by the Morrison government travel ban

by

A dual-citizen Indian that has not been to the Economic Zone Formerly Known As Australia since 2013 has lashed out at the Morrison Government for abandoning him. Despite overwhelming public support for the ban and even more supporting a permanent ban on flights from India, dual citizens says they have been left in the dark. … Read more

“Keep the borders open with India” says party still unsure why they lost 2019 federal election

by

The ALP has criticised the Morrison government for it’s temporary COVID travel ban with India, saying “it’s a racist, gross violation of human rights.” Anthony Albanese and Bill Shorten have both made statements in the last week opposing the bans originating from India to the Economic Zone Formerly Known As Australia, despite mass public support … Read more

Jacinda Ardern says at least 4 more lockdowns necessary for middle class submission to the Great Reset

by

The Economic Zone Formerly Known as New Zealand’s Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern has stated that she believes at least 4 more lockdowns are necessary to break the middle class into submission, in order to accept the globalist Great Reset. Ardern, who has threatened “no jab no job” policies at the weekend, has stated that she … Read more

Uber Eats rider who caused multiple fatality accident in Melbourne says more needs to be done to protect riders

by

The EZFKA city of Melbourne is reeling tonight, after a multiple fatality accident in the CBD killed three citizens. An Uber Eats rider has been taken into custody and charged with three counts of negligent driving causing death, after three pedestrians were killed after they were struck by a scooter on the footpath. Speaking through … Read more

EZFKA to lockdown for a month after Hubble space telescope detects coronavirus near Alpha Centauri

by

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has ordered EZFKA into lockdown for a month, after NASA stated the Hubble space telescope had detected what appeared to be coronavirus on Proxima Centauri. The planet, located within the Alpha Centauri star system, displayed what appeared to be COVID fragments, sparking serious concerns among National Cabinet. Morrison said that Australians … Read more