New study finds direct correlation between Australian lockdowns and expiration dates of state of emergency powers

A new study has found a direct correlation between Australian lockdowns and the expiration dates of state of emergency powers. The study, from the Institute of Non-Globalist Shitcunts, has found that lockdowns always occur when state of emergency powers are due to expire or when significant holidays are about to commence. “We’ve found that state … Read more

Victorian public servant with guaranteed income bravely tweets support for fifth lockdown while working from home

A Victorian public sector worker in Brunswick has bravely shown solidarity with locked down Victorians on Twitter last night. After the fifth lockdown in the state of Victoria announced yesterday, Department of Health VPS6 executive manager Jane Davidson took to Twitter to show her support for Daniel Andrews from the comfort of her living room. … Read more

Mark McGowan waves to Aussie troops at Talisman Sabre from onboard Chinese surveillance ship

WA Premier Mark McGowan has sent his regards to Australian troops participating in Talisman Sabre war games in Queensland, from a Chinese surveillance ship parked offshore. Ex-Navy legal officer McGowan waved to Australian military personnel from the deck of the People’s Liberation Army Navy ship Yu So Fukd this week, and was honoured for his … Read more

Weekend Links, 17-18 July, 2021

GTA SA

Welcome to the Weekend Links for 17-18 July 2021! We are really happy you are all here, and are hoping for a good weekend of argy-bargy. So this week South Africa got exciting, but so did Cuba and there are rumors of excitement in Georgia and Tajikistan too. All this is happening as the stories … Read more

New Melbourne Quarantine Facility to be named “Glorious Linfox Centre For COVID Re-Education Through Hard Labour”

Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews has announced that the upcoming quarantine facility to be built outside Melbourne, will be named “Glorious Linfox Centre For COVID Re-Education Through Hard Labour” The deal comes as lockdowns rage throughout Australia. The new facility will house “anti-vaxxers, returning citizens and anyone having political opinions not reflective of a fair, diverse … Read more

Frewen promises mandatory lead injections for those who refuse ”totally not mandatory” injection

COVID Commander Lieutenant John Frewen has announced that summary executions will take place should Australians refuse the COVID vaccine. “We call it the Aussie version of the Escobar doctrine – plata o plomo. But this time it’s graphene oxide in place of the silver,” Frewen said. “Australians haven’t read the recent legislation in WA and … Read more

Scott Morrison announces new “Star of COVID” for those Australians who refuse the jab

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has announced that Australians that refuse to take a COVID vaccine or get a vaccine passport will be issued a “Star of COVID” as a raft of globally co-ordinated measures hit Australia. The move comes after many Australians have refused to take the vaccine, citing numerous safety concerns, blatant coercion and … Read more

Greg Hunt denies vaccine statistics “made up” after record 4 trillion Australians vaccinated yesterday

Health Minister Greg Hunt has denied accusations that his vaccine uptake statistics are completely made up, after claiming 4 trillion Australians were vaccinated yesterday. The Minister stated the numbers were 560% accurate and that no inflation of statistics or deceptiveness, such as the difference between offering vaccines in aged care and taking them, had occurred. … Read more

Lockdown forever?

A quick thought experiment to cause absolutely no controversy whatsoever. What happens if covid restrictions end up being proven to prevent the 1000-4000 flu deaths that happen in Australia every year? Do we relax restrictions and accept that people will die, many more than covid has killed here. Or do we lock down forever? Why … Read more

Stewies butt hurts so much he deletes posts From article

Maybe you should run back over to MB stewie. Your ego is more fragile than dls’s. Apparently this reposting of stewies actual post gets him so butthurt he has to delete any post containing it. Where did the post go stewie? It’s not like you didn’t say it. https://www.ezfka.com/2021/08/10/bsv-case-study-cryptofights/#comment-9188

Weekend Links, 10-11 July, 2021

Scientism for the win!

Welcome to the EZFKA Weekend Links for the 10-11 July, 2021! This week we are all about bad propaganda. Why? Because as a viable economic unit within EZFKA, the least the system could provide me a good propaganda. I mean, is that too much to ask? If you are going to steal, lie, kill, maim, … Read more

Study finds ignoring Australian mainstream media permanently cures COVID

A breakthrough study has found that turning off Australian mainstream media outlets permanently solves COVID and has called for the lifting of all restrictions immediately. The study, conducted by the Institute of Non-Globalist Shitcunts, found that turning off Australian TV, radio and not reading corporate newspapers has a 100% efficacy on symptoms of COVID and … Read more

McGowan shuts borders again after new Delta Echo Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Super Mega Purple Monkey Dishwasher variant discovered

WA Premier Mark McGowan has locked down WA again, after evidence the Delta Echo Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Super Mega Purple Monkey Dishwasher has been discovered in a wastewater treatment plant. The discovery was made last night and has resulted in the entire state being locked down, with restrictions happening from tonight. McGowan said the discovery … Read more

Australia facing critical shortage of conspiracy theories as more continue to come true

The Economic Zone Formerly Known As Australia is facing a critical shortage of conspiracy theories, as more and more of them begin to come true. As lockdowns, QR code surveillance, masks and mandatory but not mandatory vaccinations proliferate, the Morrison government was concerned that the gap between conspiracy theory and fact was now down to … Read more

Which type of Australian Branch Covidian Cult Member are you?

EZFKA’s newest non-ATO recognised religious organisation has really come to the fore since March 2020 – the Church of Branch Covidians. Which flavour of COVID Kool-Aid do you most identify with? The Vaccine Worshipper: Trademark catchphrase of “I want the Pfizer vaccine and not the AstraZeneca one” because blood clots. According to her, there’s absolutely … Read more

Weekend Links, July 03-04, 2021

Sir Vaxalot The Invincible

Welcome to the Weekend Links for July 3-4, 2021. So this week there was a problem. The long and short of it is, EZFKA Weekend Links has been trying to add more AusPol. Because AusPol has implications for most of the peeps who frequent this spot. But, this is a problem. There is so much … Read more

Weekend Links, June 26-27, 2021

Days since last...

Welcome to the Weekend Links for June 26-27, 2021! So this week got exciting. Mostly because of a bloke called John McAfee pulled an Epstein. What is an Epstein you ask? An Epstein is when you are rich and powerful, have potentially incriminating evidence on other rich and powerful folks, and then Madame Clinton has … Read more

Weekend Links, JunE 18-19, 2021

ohnoes... its the popo's

Welcome to the Weekend Links for June 18-19, 2021!! We are very excited to have you here. How excited? Well, last week was the first time the comment count here at EZFKA exceeded that at MB (from whence we came lol!). Some (much) of the credit here goes to Peachy, so if you see her … Read more

Scott Morrison to introduce new “immigrant sob story” visa for migrants with no legal basis to stay in Australia

The Morrison government is understood to be in talks to introduce a new type of visa to EZFKA, that would allow migrants with no legal case but can run a convincing sob story, to stay in the country. The idea has been floated in the wake of the Tamil family saga, currently being saturated across … Read more

Weekend Links, June 12-13, 2021

Bigfoot Flipping You Off

Welcome to the Weekend Links, June 12-13, 2021. We think this week will be kind of quiet. Why? Because lots is happening and everyone is hoping it does not end up biting them in the rear. What is happening? Well – the big ones are: The medical shit show also known as Covid-19 is going … Read more

BTC legal tender in El Salvador

So what does this mean for btc? In the grand scheme of things probably not a huge amount but is a step forward in it’s legitimacy. What it does do is pose some really interesting questions. Firstly, why is El Salvador choosing to add btc to it’s current legal tender, the almighty USD. Presumably they … Read more

Brett Sutton reveals “COVID Strain Name Generator” supercomputer used for determining arbitrary lockdowns

Exclusive: Victorian CMO Brett Sutton has given reporters an exclusive look at the supercomputer responsible for generating superfluous reasoning for ongoing lockdowns in Victoria. The supercomputer, alluded to by Premier Daniel Andrews last year and developed in conjunction with the CCP, generates random names for COVID strains and calculates just how many cases are needed … Read more

The Show Trial of Derek Chauvin

Derek Chauvin has been found guilty by a jury of his ‘peers’ of second degree murder, third degree murder, and manslaughter (!) almost one year after the death of patron saint and didndunuffin exemplar George Floyd within his custody. For those of you unfamiliar, George Floyd was an alleged perp and ex convicted perp of … Read more

Woke Weekend Links (5/5/21-6/5/21)

With some trepidation, I have tried to put myself in the shoes of some of my more social justice oriented acquaintances to compile a weekend links that reflects their interests. I’m not going to throw in many critiques – that’s your job. I don’t do pics and videos. Sorry.

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