Timbo

The comments came after Australia had done everything it could to steal other countries’ mediocre medical staff during a global pandemic, claiming it wasn’t our responsibility to provide for future generations and invest in local talent.

Australians were forced to surrender their houses immediately or face removal into the already full Mickleham and Wellcamp detention camps.

Meanwhile, CAT scans have revealed that Israel Folau is still living rent free in the heads of Peter Fitzsimons and Ian Roberts.

The move, welcomed by Anthony Albanese, would help get the death rate from myocarditis and other illnesses back to an acceptable level.

Andrews said he would take full responsibility but will not resign until a board position at John Holland had opened up for him.

The move comes as cost of living and interest rates begin to cripple the economy, and questions about why Albo was giving some shithole Eastern European nation of no significance to Australia, endless tax payer money and defence equipment.

The victory was lauded as a result of the endless demoralisation project of Australia into EZFKA, a process which began in the 1970’s and expedited with New Zealand citizens being the first foreigners able to vote in Australian elections.

Albanese said he will be returning to the flood affected area next week for a quick photo-op and then on his way out of the country again.

Victorian Reason Party MLC Fiona Patten sacrificed a child to Moloch on the steps of Victorian Parliament in support of the protestors, and was looking at legislation to introduce abortion up to 28 days after birth.

Maxwell, 60, is due to be sentenced this week for her part in a child sex trafficking ring led by Jeffrey Epstein and was placed on suicide watch yesterday, ahead of some scheduled camera servicing in her cell.

The annual poll of property developers, immigration lobbyists and World Economic Forum members agreed with Andrews that the brutality, not seen since communist Russia, in the world’s most locked down city last year got it over the line.

Chris Carnegie, from Lismore, lost his house, small business and all of his possessions in the flooding and has been living in a tent for weeks with no assistance from government or anyone else.

The self-described ‘insufferable fuckwit’ stated that Australians needed to rethink their lifestyle and consumption habits if they can’t afford it. Cannon-Brookes used the opportunity to promote his personal investments of cricket flour while eating a gas-cooked bbq snag from his local RSL.

Jane Crenshaw, from Indooripilly, who tweeted ‘GREENSLAND’ just after the election, further tweeted that having no electricity was just the price to pay to save the planet.

After being told by every legal institution in the country that their claims were fabricated bullshit and costing the Australian public millions, the Nadesalingam family plan to put their feet up in the country where they claim they can never go back to.

The All Blacks will now be known as the ‘All BlackRocks’ after CEO Larry Fink was displeased with New Zealand’s ESG score and demanded the name change in line with World Economic Forum policies.

Rob Willis, from Northcote, stated that pensioners unable to pay their gas bill due to inflation and domestic gas policy was not his problem and that ‘greedy boomers brought it on themselves.’

Australians took to the streets to thank the WEF for the controlled demolition of their country, with a statue for RBA governor Phil Lowe being proposed in Sydney.

Phil Lowe said he was already working with Black Rock to facilitate residential real estate purchases in the coming months.

Paul McFarlane, 52, was rushed to hospital suffering chest pains and a suspected heart attack and then waited outside on a stretcher for 8 hours before dying.