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Satire

Victoria Police provide Extinction Rebellion protestors tea and scones after traffic shut down in CBD

October 27, 2021 by Timbo

The protestors, trying to manufacture consent for the destruction of the Australian economy, blocked off parts of the Melbourne CBD and were rapidly attended to by officers bearing refreshments.

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Andrews temporarily allows unvaccinated to shop so he can blame another lockdown on them

October 27, 2021 by Timbo

The Premier’s announcement means unvaccinated can enter retail shops until mid-November, giving contact tracers enough time to make up some cases and manufacture consent for another lockdown.

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Liberty Victoria file for bankruptcy after being M.I.A. since 2020

October 27, 2021 by Timbo

“It’s been great and a nice little cash cow for constant lobbying for anyone who is left wing, but when it comes to the Nuremburg Code and the right to bodily autonomy, that’s something we don’t want to deal with unless you’re a refugee.

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New Victorian ‘permanent pandemic legislation’ features yellow stars for ‘classes of unvaccinated individuals’

October 27, 2021 by Timbo

The legislation, which allows for discrimination of classes of individuals, will force unvaccinated individuals to wear yellow stars and bar them from public life.

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Andrews cancels 2022 state election after new permanent pandemic legislation passes

October 27, 2021 by Timbo

Andrews said the suspension may be extended and an amendment for 5-year extensions of pandemic legislation will be introduced.

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“I’m accountable and transparent” says man who won’t release public health advice

October 26, 2021 by Timbo

Andrews, who didn’t consult with most of the crossbenchers and many in his own party before introducing the legislation, denied he was being a treasonous hypocrite.

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Woman who put thousands of Victorians in poverty upset at mean words said to her

October 26, 2021 by Timbo

The video, which features Patten, some tinkly pianos and members of Eunuchs Lives Matter reading out alleged things said to her online, was published yesterday in response to the growing backlash against crossbenchers siding with the government.

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Victorian Liberal Party prepare rubber stamp to approve Daniel Andrews’ permanent pandemic legislation

October 26, 2021 by Minister Sinister

The legislation, named the ‘I can’t believe it’s not a coup’ Act will give the ALP permanent emergency powers up to the lead up of the 2022 election. The LNP say they stand ready to approve the legislation at a moment’s notice.

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Pfizer now official naming rights sponsor of Parliament House

October 26, 2021 by Minister Sinister

Parliament House will now be known as ‘Pfizer Arena’ as the pharmaceutical giant looks to stamp it’s authority even further on EZFKA.

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Daniel Andrews launches new ‘Freedom Pass’ booster subscription service for Victoria

October 26, 2021 by Minister Sinister

Victorians will be required to subscribe to the monthly service through the Service Victoria app as well as ensure their booster shots are current.

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United Nations celebrates total victory over Australia by raising flags over Sydney and Melbourne

October 25, 2021 by Minister Sinister

The globalist organisation declared war on Australia in the early 1970’s and finally celebrated victory after a hard fought, 50-year plus subversion campaign.

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Victorians celebrate their first weekend of freedom by showing their medical history to enter businesses

October 25, 2021 by Minister Sinister

Dubbed a ’21st digital version’ of Soviet Russia’s internal pasport system, Victorians the state over were celebrating showing their papers just to access basic services.

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