Australian Senator Jacqui Lambie has been ordered into isolation this evening after failing a test for demonic possession.
In one of the greatest heel turns in Australian politics, Lambie gave yet another maniacally unhinged rant in the Senate in defence of discriminating against Australians despite previously supporting the right to choose. Scanners detected that Lambie was again possessed by demonic entities and told to isolate.
‘I can confirm that Senator Lambie is possessed by Satan or one of his other archangels and has been told to isolate,” a spokesman for Parliament House said.
“She’s never been the same since she sold her soul. The sacrifice ritual at Pfizer HQ a few months ago really pushed her over the edge. Normally we don’t have a problem with demonically possessed MP’s as that is the standard, but Jacquie is making it way too obvious.”
Lambie is apparently under the care of Baphomet until further notice.