Australian man bravely ventures out from under the bed to see if virus with 99.8% survival rate has subsided

A Perth man has bravely come out from under his bed to see if the danger from the deadly COVID virus has subsided.

John Morrison, 35 from Fremantle, went outside from under his bed for the first time in months to see if the danger had subsided.

“Mate, Sunrise was telling me how deadly it was everyday. They told me you only had a 99% chance of surviving infection so that was enough for me. Under the bed with three masks on reading endless media doom porn was the only safe place to be,” John said.

“I’ve also been reading Macrobusiness. They said it’s an absolute disaster everywhere and that Melbourne is like Hiroshima in 1945. Bodies everywhere.”

John, who lined up for hours just to get vaccinated, had choice words for those who thought the danger wasn’t over.

“These selfish people that think they can ignore the rules. Just get the bloody jab it’s not hard. We’re all in this together. Stop killing the grandmothers you pretended to care about when you dumped them in aged care ten years ago.”

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Incisive…. 🔪


im kind of just amazed at how scared australians still are about covid, esp under 50s, even this far out from when it started. the obsessing over “deep cleaning” (what the fuck does that mean), wiping down surfaces, if covid really was as deadly as theyve made it out to be none of us would be allowed to leave our home and all our groceries would be delivered in hermetically sealed containers by guys in hazmat suits.


Deep cleaning seems to be spraying disinfectant over everything.

Agent 47

Or those out of work international students moving in teams in high vis wiping random light poles at tram stops in Melbourne.


Whilst I don’t agree that this is just another flu, it is more deadly. What I do agree with is the poor media handling of everything to do with the virus. Media ran stories of it killing hundreds of thousands in Australia to don’t worry about it. It ran hero stories of people sneaking through borders and praising the AFL hub and then crucifying two young girls for lying to get into Queensland. Also crucified a doctor in Victoria even though he followed government instructions when returning from the US.
Now the media is baying for international borders to be open but mute on other states closing the border to Victoria. The media assasinated the credibility of Astra Zeneca vaccine and then complains about the slow rollout. Particularly MB was bad at this one.
The media was interviewing Richard Branson and report verbatim that we will be left behind. How are we left behind? Most people are happy how things are in Australia with a closed border. Branson is only interested in bums on seats of his aircraft and not the well-being of Australians.


That’s right Rambo.

Applying the EZFKA analysis tool, I’d say that the media “handling” that you’re pointing out is the result of the fragmentation of the interest of the EZFKA elites/powerful on the issues.

In regular times, everyone’s interest are well aligned (unsurprising – as they have all evolved and adapted to thrive under EZFKA conditions). So everyone’s pocket “journalists” push largely consistent propaganda.

In virus-times, alignment has been broken. looking at the poles:

  • Groups like farmers, airlines, large hoteliers, large land developers need foreign bods (ie open borders) to make profits.
  • Groups like miners, large groceries, small retailers of all sorts will make profits as long as people aren’t locked in their homes (even without foreign bods)

So pocket “journalists” of the first group push “let it rip” or “love with the virus” or “mass vaccinate and reopen” type lines and crucify opponents.

pocket “journalists” of the second group push lines that are aligned with the idea that we could happily live in a fortress for a long time – as long as it gets stamped out here and life is normal locally, the external flows are unimportant. So brutal quarantine, slow-n-steady vaccination, etc.


Makes so much more sense when you look at the EZFKA perspective.


Yes the cognitive dissonance I think is strong in the media and the LNP in general at the moment.

LNP is usually ‘strong’ on borders/defence as a centre right party, but secretly needs to re open them ASAP for immigration ponzi to continue… I can only imagine the convos happening right now between scummo and joshy.

Chinese Astroturfer

It’s far less deadly than H1N1 as a explained above. In past pandemics we haven’t had so many geriatrics artificially kept alive and an obesity epidemic in young people.

All these people scared of dying from COVID I hope they have gone vegetarian and exercise everyday. Lifestyle choices will do more damage to them than COVID ever will.

Agent 47

Spot the fuck on. It’s the flu rebranded, that explains why all the flu stats have been cannabilised. Apparently that’s a controversial opinion.

My concern now is the Wuhan lab angle will transform into a 2021 WMD Iraq moment and conflict in the South China Sea. Then you will see real casualties.

Chinese Astroturfer

I can’t be bothered finding the source but Sweden’s total number of deaths last year were quite a bit lower than past years that had bad flu seasons.

Don’t forget that Sweden’s population has increased 20-25% in the past couple of decades too.

Sweden also have a relatively healthy population I suppose, but they did during past bad flu seasons as well.

Chinese Astroturfer

Of the 910 COVID deaths in the country, only 5 of them were under 50 years of age.

No doubt those 5 people had serious underlying health problems as well.

The risk is still very low for even people under 60.

H1N1 when it was a novel virus was far more deadly it killed 50 million mainly young and healthy people.

In 1919 there weren’t any people with serious underlying health conditions for the virus to kill they just died at a young age. Average lifespan back then was 60.

Imagine how many people H1N1 would have killed back in 1919 if we had 90 year olds propped up with a cocktail of medication and advanced medical procedures, or fat f*cks in the prime of their life with diabetes, heart disease, cholesterol, etc. Two thirds of Aussies are classified as obese today in 1919 almost no-one was obese.

Basically COVID is nothing, far less scary than H1N1 when it was novel.

Last edited 3 years ago by Chinese Astroturfer