Victoria has announced they will be scrapping vaccine passports, after punters across Melbourne have been telling retailers they ‘can’t recall’ if they’ve been vaccinated.
Locals have been using the line every time they are asked by some poor wage pleb when entering the premises, leading many retailers to throw in the towel.
Local man Robbo, 32, stated the 21st century version of the Soviet passport system can ‘go and get fucked.’
“Every time I’ve been to the pub I’ve told them I can’t recall, works every time,” Robbo said.
“If it’s good enough for Dan Andrews, it’s good enough for me.”
Andrews has reportedly been infuriated and has vowed to send anyone caught using this defence straight to the Mickleham Centre for ‘re-education.’