“Australian vaccine statistics are completely legitimate” says country running million-dollar lottery begging people to get vaccinated

EZFKA Health Minister Greg Hunt has announced a million-dollar lottery with a “no jab, no ticket” entry, begging Australians to get vaccinated.

Hunt has denied accusations that the vaccination statistics are massively inflated and that a million-dollar lottery to get vaccinated was not proof the the whole thing was a sham.

“We’ve been very successful in getting people to line up. We’ve only had to threaten, coerce, segregate, bully, shame, gaslight, guilt and harass people 24/7. Now we’re going the bribery route,” Hunt said.

“I mean people could just enter the normal lottery without rolling the dice with their health, but we don’t do anything measured here. The case numbers are total bullshit with all the false positives, so who would notice if the vaccine numbers were dodgy too?”

Hunt will announce more competitions next week, including a trip for two lucky Australians to the World Economic Forum.